or The Slow Abdication of Nations
 |
| Jenna, Dennis, and Donny |
Father
Your lines of order
Run in my blood.
But the world system died
Long before you did.
Unnoticed
The dinosaur's head lopped off,
The great body still
Gracefully lumbering
To the end of the sentence.
I looked for you
To forsake wars and airplanes
And to come play with me,
To take mum and me
Out to dinner and dancing
And movies of superheroes
Usually fighting wars
Just like you do,
I looked for you
When we moved to a new school
And mum had to work
And I played with
My little brothers
After school let out....
'Cause we couldn't afford
A baby sitter.
Anyway, I grew and grew, and later on
That first young man had your first name
(and I never got his last name).
He took me dancing
And we saw that movie
Of superheroes conquering all;
and he conquered all
And disappeared,
Just like my daddy
When it came time to go home
And pay for the babysitter.
Father, I missed you.
But it wasn't the first time.
And I know what to expect
From church and state.
I know that house was
Never really there
Only a household
Partly packed, ready to move.
I know teeth shine,
Lips are warm,
Body is beautiful but
Better this than a tiger's smile.
All will pass. All has passed.
Let's not pretend though.
Words manipulate.
Words feel good and keep you
From looking around.
Without words I'm still here.
Without words you're still gone.
Without words my feet stand firm.
Men come and go just like you.
But let's not pretend.
The language of the empire is dead.
I will not hear
The words that call me a failure.
I will not hear
The words that divide my brain.
And make me think there
Must be an other.
The sentence may follow logically,
But the words no longer
Are rational or esthetically pleasing.
Empty sand structures,
Music no longer playing through them.
Can it be the the wind has died...
Or has the structure crumbled
Too much to hold the tone?
The stars still hold me in place...
The ancient matriarchy.
Isn't this how it always is?
The sun and moon rolling
Across the zodiac,
The milky way,
the great placenta of heaven.
You, Father, may indeed rest.
You were always at home someplace
Within her arms.
I wander, a restless child
Who can never leave home.
The state of being does not abdicate.
The church of forever does not persecute
Nor excommunicate.
May beach parties and barbeques
Take the place of my father's wars
Forever and ever
Ah men!
-Jehanah-
